Tips to appoint a Couples Therapist
With so many couples getting separated and divorced at the highest rate in the recent time, quality couple therapy is a great idea. But, what’s important is finding yourself a professional couple therapist. Only 14% of the therapists of US have stated that they terapi par with actual training of couple therapy. A lot of therapist who claim to be a professional in this field apply training they have received while working with the people to the couple dynamics thinking that it will work, but the reality is that it doesn’t. Here are some of the things which you should ask a potential couple therapist at the time of interviewing procedure.
- Have they had any training in working with couples? If yes, then where were the classes. It will help you know whether the therapist was honest about his qualifications or not.
- How many couples have you helped in the past one year?
- What are the theoretical perspective you conceptualize your patients with? The two of the common theoretical perspectives used by couples therapist are EFT (Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy) and IMAGO. If the therapist doesn’t use any theory, then he may have no idea of how to treat the couple. You may be wasting your resources and time under their guidance.
- Do you work on communication skills? If the therapist says Yes but do not prove it right, then he may be saying it in words. It is very important to have a good communication between you and your patient.
- Does the therapist work with the couples individually or speak to them as a team? If they do so, then they are not couple therapist, they are individual therapist. Under most conditions, where the partners split up because of lack of trust, some trauma or domestic violence, the therapist should talk to them together.
- How does the therapist make sure that he doesn’t take sides of any of the partner? This question will help you acknowledge how the therapist conceptualizes the dynamics of the couple. Do they see couple as two different people or one entity impacting one another? It is very important for the therapist to understand both the partners and then make them understand one another.
- Does the couples therapist see the partners in an emotional bond with one another or do they end up giving a verdict that they cannot be together? Therapists who give their couples tasks to complete like going on dates, doing chore jobs of the house together are missing the point. it is the emotional bond between the couple which is loosening the gap. The task to do chores or bring flowers for wife may strengthen the bond but without concentrating directly on how that bond has loosened up with time, the therapist will be wasting more time and missing out the major nuclei completely.
So, find out if the couples therapist passes all the above mentioned points and then only choose him/ her as your relationship advisor.